I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
