didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
