He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
