ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize