i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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