My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
