I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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