i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
