That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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