The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
