I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
