We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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