He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Randomize
