My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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