Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
