We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize
