What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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