My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
