We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
