its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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