I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
