The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
