I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
