fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My cat gives me a boner
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
