1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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