anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize