yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
