doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Randomize
