Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
