She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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