it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
