false alarm. still invincible.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
