Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
