you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
