halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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