You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
