margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
