Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
