You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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