If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Green mimosas i think yes
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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