What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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