Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
do herpes really smell.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
