At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Is that strawberry winking at me??
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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