Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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