That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
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