Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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