i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
