dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
