I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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