I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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