"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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